Achamba – The Super MBA

Achamba - The Super MBA

Greatness wasn’t thrust upon him. He earned it, or rather paid for it, depending on how you look at it. All his alleged super-powers were hardly the result of an experiment gone horribly wrong (some might dispute that theory).

At the risk of causing serious damage to his financial well-being, he went through a rigorous 2-year process of conditioning and training that converted him into the super-being that he thinks he is.

Now with his super-powers he selflessly strives hard to save the corporate world and make it a better place for all innocent, hard-working and ignorant souls around him.

But it wasn’t always like that. Aditya Chamba (Adi to his friends) grew up as a regular kid with all the normal fears that plague the untrained brain. Maths, exams and data overload jitters were the popular plots that his nightmares were based on.

After close to 2 decades of basic education, he thought he had learnt everything he needed to help him lead an enjoyable life and sail towards retirement. He was so mistaken.

His real education started when he entered the corporate world. Very soon he realised (or rather his bosses made him realise) how little he knew. He realised that the functioning of the business world was too vast and complicated for his little brain to comprehend.

The 12 hours of his life that he contributed daily to his employer from his small cubicle were less than a drop in the ocean. All the big decisions were taken behind closed doors of cabins where the powers that be, stay put, coming out occasionally to gulp huge quantities of fresh air mixed with cigarette smoke (or vice versa).

Adi wanted those powers and he wasn’t willing to wait like the rest of the sissies around him to develop them organically. It was a question of working smart versus working hard. Well, not working was also an option, but Adi’s dignity and bank balance wouldn’t allow that. After a lot of soul searching, he knew what stood between him and the powers he seeked – an MBA degree from Bizcool B-school, the premier management institution he always dreamt of.

Not too many people are sure of what happened in the next 2 years, but he came back transformed. The simple guy next door, Adi Chamba had become Achamba (that’s uh-chum-baa, meaning ‘Wonder’ in Hindi), the Super MBA. He had strange and wonderful powers that none could fathom. He could come up with answers to all (ALL) problems, using strange looking diagrams and notes that he referred to as ‘frameworks’.

His fear of numbers had vanished and in fact replaced by an obsession, as he sliced and diced into random data that he could access out of the blue. The scariest part was he had figured out how to use the Pivot Table feature in MS Excel! Plus many more powers that would be gradually revealed on unsuspecting occasions. His bosses love him and those around him wonder why.

Adi claims that his Achamba avatar has been grossly misunderstood.

People think he is arrogant. He defines it as ‘natural confidence that emanates from knowing all the answers’.

Folks think he underestimates the complexity of real life problems. He thinks this general public perception stems from his peers’ ignorance about his problem solving toolset.

Many say he is overpaid. He says he is just a prime example and a personification of how successful products can be created and marketed to fill a void that never existed. To which the others say, ‘Huh???’

Some say Achamba is just a urban legend. Others say they have been at the receiving end of his magical powers. What’s your stand? Have you seen him lurking in your office?

Share the post with your MBA friends, only with the cool sporting ones though. Keep it away from the real Achambas in your office.

If you found this interesting, read more about the adventures of Achamba – The Super MBA.

Achamba is looking for some new friends (the first few are always extra special), and his ego will get a royale massage morale would get a boost if you ‘Like’ his Facebook page and share it with your social media friends.


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Sameer Kamat //
Sameer Kamat
Founder of MBA Crystal Ball. Author of Beyond The MBA Hype & Business Doctors. Here's more about me. Connect with me on Google+ | Twitter | Facebook | Linkedin

15 Comments

  1. neelesh jain says:

    Acha MBA.

    Great …..

  2. Sameer Kamat says:

    Yes, ‘Acha’ MBA (good MBA) is Adi’s self-perception, irrespective of what the world might think ;-)

    Good to see you on this site, Neelesh. I’m assuming you are the Neelesh Jain I know.

  3. Anil Gandham says:

    HaHa I see where it is going :D Good work :)

  4. Sameer Kamat says:

    Anil bhai, please enlighten us too, coz as of now, we have no clue where this is going :-)

  5. Nivedita says:

    Amazing!! like the catchy name :) im sure the book will be super interesting too!

  6. Sameer Kamat says:

    Thanks, Nivedita. There are no book plans (yet). Just launched the character to have some fun.

  7. Krishna Kumar says:

    Lateral thinking….

  8. Karthikeyan says:

    Awaiting more posts from our AchaMBA !!!

  9. Ritu says:

    That’d be the same superhero who is never around when *actual* work has to be done, right? :)

  10. Sameer Kamat says:

    Yes, Ritu. ‘Invisibility-on-demand’ is one of his super-powers.

    Seems like some of your office colleagues have the same power.

  11. Ritu says:

    Had, Sameer, had. :)

    It used to be equal measures of amusing and annoying. All that hot air and no substance. Now, with my own venture, the ones who like to go invisible stay invisible, even when it is time to sign the cheques. :)

    Hmm, forgot to mention it earlier, this whole ‘work hard’ vs. ‘work smart’ thing had soon became a warning sign for those who just couldn’t be depended upon. One learned to measure their advice in terms of manhours required and ask them, immediately, if they were volunteering to organise the effort or were merely giving helpful suggestions. :)

  12. Saif says:

    Sameer, I think it would be great if you could dedicate part 2 of this biopic, highlighting Achamba’s social life. The way he turns up at office parties, how he interacts with colleagues in a social setting, and what are his culinary likes and dislikes!!

  13. Sameer Kamat says:

    Saif,

    Thanks for the idea. Our regular work-load makes it tough to follow-up on a lot of interesting ideas. Which is why this has stayed on the backburner for so long.

    Achamba is more active in your mind, than in mine as I’ve left the corporate world quite a while back. So your, er, wounds are more recent.

    It’ll be great if folks like you who have a creative mind, a sense of humour and some good writing skills come forward and contribute.

    You could write about specific aspects of Achamba’s personality, social life and office adventures.

    Are you up for the challenge? If so, send me an expanded draft of what you’ve just proposed.

  14. Nagendra says:

    Very interesting. The lingo, word play, humor, goes along well.

    This is a great website.

    Now, for the next, yet to be released part … how about disillusioning everyone about the corporate world and revealing how big a sham the MBA degree really is… probably one the the reasons you fell out of love with. (I know huge presumption here).

    AchaMBA can then go ahead, leave his job, start travelling or learning jujitsu and try seeking spiritual and physcal well being. Or may be your could base it on the MBA stereotype that – competes for a percentile and in the process ends up reading a lot of books and then tries one of the more upcoming options of novel writing, we all know about the Chetans and the Amishs now… May be AchaMBA comes up with a version of Desi Twilight… I wonder what that would be like.

  15. Sameer Kamat says:

    Nagendra: We haven’t had much time and bandwidth to have some fun at Achamba’s expense.

    Given your creative bent of mind, would you like to write the sequel post?

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